Friends, allies, comrades, I come to you with an urgent and horrifying news story; 2017 is over, and it was … a fantastic year for movies. Don’t listen to the haters who claim this year didn’t have any big daddy, stand-out masterpieces, like “La La Land” and “Moonlight” last year and “Mad Max: Fury Road” the year before -- those people are just … just monsters. The reason there doesn’t seem to be a couple stand-out films is because, to be a tad colloquial, this year was just so consistently dope. In this blogger’s humble opinion, this year had ten or more movies that I think will be remembered with extremely high regard, like Guillermo Del Toro’s creature feature/romance “The Shape of Water” and Martin McDonagh’s fiery vigilante dramedy “Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri,” to name just a few. There weren’t two or three stand-out movies; there were a cool dozen or so.
So as much as I wanted to go proverbially mad with power and publish my own personal top ten movies of this year that I adored so, there were so many great movies across so many genres that I reluctantly relinquished such power and became a man of the people. Instead of such cinematic tyranny, we conducted another office staff film poll, this time adding our two new interns, Tanner and Chelsey, to the mix. Everyone chose their top two movies of the year, having our list come out to an even ten. I was tempted to make it eleven or nine just to spite “top ten” lists but, again, I practiced extraordinary restraint.
So without, further ado, here they are, the Trove crew’s picks for best movies of 2017!
Editing Savant, Winner of The Most Advanced Office Infant Award, Too Good-Looking for His Own Good
“Blade Runner 2049”
Directed by Denis Villeneuve, written by The Original “Blade Runner” People That Are Surprisingly Still Alive, starring an Expressionless Ryan Gosling and Cinema Relic Harrison Ford
I had the pleasure of going with Baby Addy to see this sequel to the 1982 sci-fi classic and holy mamacita, we were not disappointed. While it starts a bit slow, before you know it Villeneuve (“Sicario,” “Arrival”) and LEGENDARY cinematographer Roger Deakins have sucked you into the dystopian world of the film with some truly bonkers imagery and lofty themes that truly do its predecessor justice. When we walked out, Addisohn said to me, “It didn’t even feel like a movie,” or that was what I was able to make out given the lil’ baby just learned to speak recently. Still though, preach, brotha’, preach.
Directed by James Mangold, written by X-Men Writers Who Curse, starring The Greatest Showman
Addisohn was uncharacteristically violent in his demanding that I mention he doesn’t want to praise “Logan,” Hugh Jackman’s last ride as his Wolverine character, as “being good for a superhero movie.” He claimed that factor had nothing to do with it, and that my life was in danger if I stated that in this review. He dug “Logan” because it is a “perfect adventure movie,” whether it was in the midst of violence or emotion (lil’ Baby Addy cried, poor guy!). He also wants to give a special shout-out to AMC nachos, which apparently enhanced the moviegoing experience.
Editing Apprentice, Man of Extraordinary Taste (They Align With My Own), Curiouser and Curiouser Intern
First off, a big round of applause for Tanner as he joins the team; hurrah, huzzah, hip hip, yaaay alright that’s enough.
“The Disaster Artist”
Directed by James Franco, written by Guys Who Love Terrible Movies, starring a Radically Different Version of James Franco and His Less Talented Brother
The bizarre tale behind the making of “The Room,” one of the most hilariously awful films of all time, “The Disaster Artist” is a passion project of James Franco, as he also stars in it as the peculiar and borderline frightening creator of the “The Room,” Tommy Wiseau. Tanner thought it was one of the best American comedies he’s seen in years, and it definitely is hysterical, as any day in the life of the seemingly Eastern European, vampiric being that is Tommy Wiseau must be.
Directed by JORDAN PEELE?!, written by JORDAN PEELE?!, starring Off-Putting White People and Daniel Kaluuya
The big zeitgeist movie of the year, Tanner rolled with the masses and picked what many are considering the best movie of the year in “Get Out.” Jordan Peele’s critically lauded debut (yes, that’s the Peele of “Key and Peele,” making award-winning film) ended up one of Tanner’s favorites due to the fact that the movie just sort of defies explanation and invents its own genre. To define it is to host a veritable slash palooza, as it’s a comedy/drama/thriller/horror film about modern racism and “liberalism” in America. Look at all of those slashes! Tanner’s got a point.
Social Media Queen, Wielder of Near-Frightening Confidence, the Orson Welles of Behind the Scenes Footage
First off, let’s give a big round of applause for Chelsey for joining the team just this week; yippy, woo of the hoo, cheeeeeers alright that’s enough.
“War for the Planet of the Apes”
Directed by Matt Reeves, written by Simian Sympathizers, starring Andy Serkis, The Greatest Actor You’ve Seen But Never Seen
The capper in what turned out to be one of the most surprisingly great movie trilogies in recent memory, “War for the Planet Apes” floored Chelsey because it simply continued to do what the trilogy has done all along, but taken to powerful new heights. A great story, incredible acting (seriously just because the actors are doing motion capture doesn’t mean they’re not acting, WHERE ARE THE OSCARS PEOPLE), and, speaking of, outrageously well-done special effects are what the trilogy, and especially this final film, does best. The apes look so real, going hand-in-hand with how real they’re portrayed and written. Andy Serkis is a god amongst mere mortals, as he’s now portrayed the protagonist of these films, Caesar, as well as King Kong and Smeagol (and Gollum!).
Directed by Patty Jenkins, written by The Few Intelligent Writers for DC, starring a Figurative and Literal Goddess
The best reviewed superhero movie of all time according to Rotten Tomatoes, “Wonder Woman” burst into multiplexes and stole the show from its DC brethren (i.e. the awful “Batman vs. Superman,” the awful “Man of Steel,” and the somehow … more awful “Suicide Squad”), while also stealing this blogger’s heart, as I appear to have fallen deeply in love with Gal Gadot, the film’s star. Chelsey thought it was just a “wonder”-ful (I’m … I’m sorry) moviegoing experience, thoroughly enjoying the fantastical escapism it allowed.
Producer, Man with the Eyes of A Fly, Office Comedian
“Call Me By Your Name”
Directed by Luca Guadagnino, written by A Man Intent on Making People Cry, starring A Young Man in A Bazillion Movies This Year, The Coolest Dad in Film History, and Armie Hammer
A movie I fully expected to be good, but did not expect to be as good as it was. I’m a man who loves his superlatives -- in fact I think I’m the greatest supporter of superlatives of all time -- but “Call Me By Your Name” moved me in a way that I could have never predicted, and it may be the best movie I’ve seen this decade so far. Its subject matter isn’t for everyone (a 17 and 24 year old pair of men fall in love in Italy in the 1980s) but its message is universal, becoming fully realized in a monologue by Michael Stuhlbarg as the aforementioned father that brings the house down. There wasn’t a dry eye in the house.
Written and directed by MY IDOL, starring The Greatest Actor of All Time and An Unknown Actress Who Somehow Might Be Better In It
For the record, my idol is Paul Thomas Anderson, and the aforementioned actors are the immortal Daniel Day-Lewis and the in-freaking-credible Vicky Krieps, coming out of nowhere to almost steal the show. It’s vintage PTA (“Boogie Nights,” “There Will Be Blood,” “The Master”), an intense psychological character study, but with some serious tweaks to the formula. Like “Get Out,” it practically creates its own genre, and it’s a surprising one, as it ends up being this thrilling mix of romance, comedy, gothic-horror, drama, and period piece. What a proverbial doozy of a movie.
The Man With the Veritable Plan, Trove Pope, The Zeus of Trove’s Mount Olympus
Written and directed by Edgar “How Is Someone So Quick-Witted?” Wright, starring A Charming Boy With an Awful Name, Kevin-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, and Depraved Actors Ditching Their Typical Charisma
Maybe the most entertaining movie of the year, Edgar Wright’s follow-up to the also preposterously entertaining Cornetto trilogy (“Shaun of the Dead,” “Hot Fuzz,” “The World’s End,”) is an audiovisual miracle. Somehow, some way, Wright sets scene after scene after scene of this heist caper to music. And not just like “Guardians of the Galaxy” style, where you’re just nodding your head to the beat of a bomb song playing over the scene. In “Baby Driver,” it’s the characters that are nodding their heads to the music, as Wright choreographs key scenes to music. Characters walk, run, punch, even shoot guns to the beat of whatever song is playing, and Ben was a serious fan of the choreography. It’s a wild experience, one that leaves you high on its cinematic fumes.
Directed by Andy Muschietti, written by Stephen King Acolytes, starring The Nightmarish Clown to End All Nightmarish Clowns and A Group of Outrageously Charming Preteens
Noted by Ben as one of the best moviegoing experiences he had all year, “It” had millions of other people in a similar mood, as it became one of the highest grossing horror movies of all time. One of the best Stephen King adaptations ever, “It” centers on the preposterously likeable Losers Club and their battle against the titular creature, portrayed here with fiendish and maniacal delight by Bill Skarsgard in a truly bed-wettingly terrifying performance as Pennywise the Dancing Clown. Ben cited the projector scene, where the Losers come face-to-face with Pennywise as a group for the first time as a particularly notable scene that he confesses legitimately scared him. I, too, found this … I don’t want to talk about it any more. Spoiler alert; HE COMES RIGHT THROUGH THE SCREEN AND HE’S ENORMOUS IT’S TOO MUCH.
Having said that, I’d see it again!
So that’s the blog for the week folks! We know we may have a missed a few flicks, but feel free to sound off with what you guys think are the some of the best you saw this year! And if you liked what you read -- which you … you must have -- feel free to check out the rest of our blogs on our truly stunning website. Thanks again for reading!